I have no problems with spending our last week in Paris together all day long. When we get home, I clean up Aizen’s scratches and put some bandaids on them. It doesn’t take much to get them in a better mood. All Thad to say was that they weren’t ever going back there again.
As I box everything up to send to our new home, I have to admit that I am going to miss this place. This is where they were born. Where I struggled for the first few months as a first–time mom until I met Kendra. Their nanny has been a dream since hiring her. She agreed to move here with me and is more than thrilled to be on the same continent as her family again.
Both Aizen and Ayrie took their first steps here. They both called me Mama for the first time here and I am getting very sentimental now. I go to the bathroom so the kids don‘ t see me cry. Kendra sees me though.
This will be good for you and them,” she reminds me. “Us too,”
“I know. It’s just, this was our home for so long,”
“I am very excited for California,” she laughs.
“I am very excited for the kids to see it too,” I feel much better.
1 take the kids to a couple of museums and the Eiffel Tower one last time so we can say goodbye and have lots of pictures. During our flight, I can’t help but feel nervous. for some reason. Aizen sleeps through most of it but like me, Ayrie doesn’t shut her
eves once
“Mommy, are we going to see Grandpa again this time?”
“Uh, I clear my throat remembering how telling my dad I was a mother of two without telling him the name of their father went. ‘Not this time. We’re moving there. It’s going to be our new home,”
“Is it going to be a regular house this time?” she asks excitedly.
“It’ll be an apartment first. I want to find the perfect house. Would you like to help with that?”
“Will it be by the beach?” she asks excitedly. I may have mentioned we’d be by the beach.
“Would you like it to be?”
“Yes,” she nods eagerly. “We never been to the beach,”
“We can go this weekend while we settle in. It’s not too far from our apartment,”
“Oui, s’il vous plaît,” she giggles and crawls onto my lap. “Do we still have to talk French?”
“Not if you don’t want to. In California mostly everyone speaks English,”
“What do the others speaks?”
“It depends, but where we’re going I’d have to say Spanish,”
“We don’t know Spanish,” she curls into me
“No, well. You don’t, I laugh.
“You do?” she gasps.
“I do,” I nod. “And so does Kenny,”
“Awesome sauce. I want Kenny to teach me Spanish,”
“You don’t want me to teach you?”
“I want you to find the perfect beach house, Mommy. Better than Barbie’s,” she laughs.
“Better than Barbie’s, huh?” I tickle her. She giggles and then wraps her arms around
“Are you sad, Mommy?” she asks.
“Why would you ask that?”
“Because Mrs. Reedly said you must be a sad fuck with two kids and no husband,”
Kendra was in the midst of drinking water. She almost spits it out and starts coughing. I have to fight laughing harder than I ever have in my entire life. I hear a couple of Haughs from the other private areas in the first–class lounge. Her little French accent only serves in her favor.
Mrs. Reedly is probably explaining to her husband that they’re being sued by some crazy American woman at the moment along with the school who transferred their son to a different private academy.
“No, Ayrie. I am not sad. You are not allowed to repeat that ever again in your life,” I finally laugh.
“I promise,” she giggles. “Can I go lay down with Bubbie?”
“Yeah, I’ll take you,” I sigh and stand.
I take her over to him and tuck her in next to him. It’s crazy how alike they look like this. I cover them and signal Kendra to watch them. She’s still bright red. She gives me a thumbs up. It was never a secret. I never told anyone I was married and with how public my profile is, the moms all had their laugh at my expense. So did some of my co
-workers.
My boss has been trying to set me up left and right, but I honestly didn’t have the time between runways and the kids. Sure, Kendra took a lot of the weight off, but there was no way I was going to end up with a French man. My father would hunt both of us down
I wash my hands and open the door to get back to my seat. The door across from me opens at the same time and a man steps out before I can.
“Excuse me,” he says politely.
My heart stops and my ears immediately start to ring. I close my eyes and shake my head. No. There is no fucking way that’s him. I step out just enough to watch him go over to the back area furthest away from the twins and then he turns around. It is him. I all but run to my sent
“You okay?” Kendra asks when I fall into my seat and grab one of the blankets to cover myself with it as if it would make me disappear.
“This is not happening. I whisper to myself.
“Oh, do you need a tampon?” she whispers.
“What?” I ask her caught off guard.
“What?” she asks defensively. “Why are you all squirrelly, Phoebs?
“No reason,” I clear my throat. I reach for a water bottle.
“Phoebe, you’re shaking,” she places her hand over mine. “Did something happen?”
“No,” I shake my head. I take a couple of deep breaths. “I just feel a little light–headed,
“Here, lie back. You’re pale,”
There is no way he’ll recognize me. He’s on the other side of the plane. It was a long time ago. I don’t even have long hair anymore and I’m dressed differently. Right? Right. Oh, my god. What are the odds of this happening? Then again, what are the odds of what happened before happening? The fucking odds are always aligned. Shit.
“I got you some sparkling water,” Kendra returns with a little green bottle.
“Thank you,” I take it.
“New home jitters?” she asks playfully
“No, just the ghosts of the past,” I mumble.
“I hear that,” she sits across from me. I forget she has crazy good hearing.
The twins are up and ready to get off the plane when we land.
There’s no way we’re going to see him again. At least, that is what I’m telling myself as we get off the plane and head down to get our luggage. As luck has it, I don’t see him again. I get my things and set them down as Kendra tells the kids that California is the coolest place in the world and that it’s also her first time here.
“Mommy, Chocolate Sprinkles!” Ayrie calls out and runs off. I look up to see her bear
stuck on the belt.
“Watch this,” I call out Kendra
“Got it,” she laughs. The bear’s overalls are stuck on the edge of the belt and I can’t get
it out.
“Excuse me,” I call out as I struggle. I’m almost to the end of the belt when a hand
reaches out and unhooks it. I stumble back making sure nothing happened to my baby‘ s favorite bear. “Thank you, so much. This my baby’s I stop when I see him standing there. “Favorite bear,”
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