From Rougue To Luna novel Chapter 18

My eyes snapped over to see him looking back at me with warmth in his eyes. He wouldn't press me for information, or respond to something I'd had to do. I knew it in my heart. He meant every word. Instead, my heart ached for whatever it was that kept him up at night, for the nightmares that plagued him as mine did me.

Maybe I could let him in. Let him see the ugly scars beneath that had been etched in to my heart for years now. Maybe this could work.

I couldn't help but turn to face him as he smiled back at me. He looked like he was part of the landscape around me, like he was meant to be here.

"What is it that you want to know first then?" I asked hesitantly. I knew I was opening a can of worms I may not be able to close, but I didn't care. I needed to release the ache in my chest I'd been carrying.

"Why don't you just start at the beginning? What happened when you left?" He turned to face me, propping his leg up while the other swung off the edge.

I thought for a moment and sighed, realizing how long it had been since I went back to that day. "That was one of the hardest days of my life. I had pushed back the grief from my mother's death and just let the need to take my life into my own hands lead me. I ended up walking in to a diner the next town over who needed help and they gave me a job on the spot. It wasn't remotely close to enough money, but it was a start. I had to spend the whole first month in the shelter down the street. It's very...difficult for women alone there." I shivered at the memory.

He sat silent, watching me as the memory of my assault played in my thoughts. "You were attacked weren't you?"

My eyes flashed up to his, but instead of the shame or pity I'd expected, he just looked down at me with warmth and concern. Genuine emotion played across his face. I took a slow breath before nodding, my eyes dropping to my hands.

"After that I finally got enough money to get out of that hell hole and into an apartment of my own. It was awful and so run down. There were leaks in the ceiling, and the air didn't even work, but it was mine."

The shame that had been festering inside of me finally burst out and I felt the dam break. Every horrible feeling I'd locked away in the tiny box inside was finally bubbling to the surface. I felt like my entire shameful past was written all over me and I was completely exposed.

His hand reached over to cup against my face and I leaned into it without realizing. I inhaled, letting his scent wrap around me like a warm blanket and reached up to place my hand against his. My body slowly began to relax in the hum of the bond.

"Look at me Lili." His voice was soft and as I looked up, his eyes sparkled with emotion.

"How can you even look at me right now?" My words hitched as the emotion threatened to clamp my throat shut all together. Tears filled my eyes and I fought the urge to let them fall freely.