Fleeing the Nightmarish Father novel Chapter 56

SAAFIA’S POV:-

I had no idea when I started needing him and his presence next to me anymore. At first I thought it was due to grief, because I lost Papa, because of the guilt inside me.

But, I was wrong.

I started feeling these sensations for him long before and he had no idea that I was not miserable, in fact, I was truly yearning for his warmth next to me.

‘How do you know you have become a reason why I am not depressed yet.’ I thought, laying on the bed with him.

My eyes stared at his handsome form. On his back, one hand on his stomach and I was holding his arm with my both hands.

Looking up as if my world had begun to create around him.

‘Do you feel the same too?’

I was about to get lost in admiring his compelling power but it was broken when he groaned and woke up gradually.

“Hey,” I whispered, unwillingly, a hint of happiness came on my face.

The thought that we shared a bed for the first time gave me flutterings. My heartbeats were going out of control to find him this close.

“Hey, how are you feeling now?” He yawned, pulling his arm away from me, wiping my glow.

No matter how softly he touched or caressed me but there was always hesitation in him, like, he was controlling himself.

“Better. Thank you for staying with me.” I spoke sincerely, sitting up slowly while leaning forward towards him.

“Be grateful that a handsome man like me is giving you some generosity.” He smirked playfully, making me chuckle slightly.

“Smile like this always. It is made for you.”

‘How can you make me forget my grief?’ I thought, lowering my gaze shyly and taking his hand in mine. He became serious at my action, waiting for me to speak.

“You are not angry with me, Dariel, are you?” I asked worriedly, nibbling on my bottom lip.

“No. I am not but next time, if there is anything you want to share, share it with me, okay? I will listen to your complaints, to your whining, to everything.” He responded softly, tightening his grip on my mind.

My heart began to hammer against my ribcage madly, making me blush at his one reassurance.

“Okay…”

Nodding timidly, I couldn’t stop my sensations and left quickly for the bathroom.

‘Oh Lord, is this possible to picture us together?’

I thought but shrugged off all my thoughts. I went down to have breakfast.

It had been a while, I was gradually recovering but the guilt in me was hurting me, it was giving me nightmares.

Worried about my depressing state, I was disturbing him as well. I knew he would grow tired of me, he would leave me if it continued.

Right?

“Why don’t you pay Sarah a visit today? You will feel better.” He offered.

“Will you come with me?” I cursed myself for asking this.

I didn’t want to become dependent on him and I was afraid that I was becoming.

“Sure.” He shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly, drinking his tea and lifting his eyes to lock them intensely on mine.

Leaning back, he rested his one leg over the other. His elbow inclined against the armrest, taking a sip of his tea with his eyes caged on mine.

“So now your habit of staring has returned?” I smirked, taking a bite of my food.

“It never stopped.”

He let out a short but husky chuckle which made my heart skip a beat. Forming my lips in a thin line, I looked down.

I wrapped my hands around his arm because it provided me with the most solace now, closing my eyes to feel his warmth only.

“Thank you so much for everything, for staying here with me, for bearing me, for not becoming tired of me.” I whispered wholeheartedly.

“Don’t be silly, why would I be? Of course I know you are annoying.” He teased, making me giggle slightly.

“I don’t know what I would have done without you.” I confessed.

He listened and gradually placed his hand over my shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze, making my heart thump madly in delight.

An unknown smile came to my lips, nuzzling closer to him. Unsure how to tell him what I had begun to feel for him.

“This too shall pass. Moments of grief never last forever. They pass. You will be back on the track before you know it.” He murmured, allowing me to rest in his embrace freely, making me feel euphoric.

“Hmm. I know. I feel much better now. All thanks to you.” I told him sincerely, contemplating his features keenly.

Since the moment he apologized to me for the first time because of Jared, I had begun to hold strange feelings for him. And they were enhanced. Each, passing, second.

“I felt the same when I lost my Mother. I.. I should have told you that she died a few years back but.. But it was hard. I understand your feelings.” He told me hesitantly.

“Thank you for being here.”

“Okay, don’t apologize this much. I heard you. I have told you, I know what you must be feeling. I was devastated too.” He hummed.

I knew he did it out of pity because he had gone through the same misery still he was here for me meant a lot. Then he kept me close when I was on the verge of scattering.

How many heartless ones could do this?

I looked up at him in mesmerization, “It is never easy to let go of the person you love, isn’t it?”

“Hmm. You are right.” He hummed, pulling away gradually from me. Maintaining his distance, the gap I didn't ask for nor wanted in the first place.

I wanted to hold him but how can I when he pulled away already?