Fleeing the Nightmarish Father novel Chapter 75

I was lost in thoughts. Before consulting or questioning anyone else, I needed to hear Dariel’s explanation. Why did Sam place such a high allegation on him?

I needed to hear his perspective so I waited for him patiently.

I was sitting on the couch, looking down at my laps. Before reaching any outcome, I must hear his justification.

With uneasiness growing wild inside me, I remained motionless until Dariel returned from work.

“Well, well, where is my welcome home?”

The man who never smiled, grinned at me, plopping on the couch beside me so he could feast his eyes at my glimpse.

‘How could he keep such a big thing secret from me, right?’ I thought distressfully.

Lifting my heavy gaze, I turned to him, curling my lips upward emptily, “Welcome home.”

In my low, weak voice, his glee vanished. Shifting closer, his resonance softened, “What happened? You look perturbed. Is everything alright?”

Swallowing hard, I found it hard to sound delighted, “Dariel…”

“Hmm?” He smiled.

“You won’t hurt me, you won’t lie to me, you care for me a lot, right?” In a hopeless resonance, I held the lapel of his coat to keep him near my chest.

My eyes were dying to seek answers which might break me but I didn’t want to stay in darkness or raise doubts between us. When he trusted me then I would do the same.

“Do you doubt it? Did I do anything to make you feel that way?” He asked in a soft murmur, placing his palm under the back of my hand to keep my hands in his endearment.

‘Should I ask him? Should I take my time? What if it broke his heart if I asked such a big thing?’ Countless disruptions yet I continued.

“Remember on our first meeting you told me I was faking. How did you know what?” I asked, growing nervous.

“Clearly it was more than the first meeting, remember? I saw you always.” He chuckled nervously, intertwining our fingers to reassure me but it didn’t help at all.

“Since the moment you saw me with Jared to this point, I didn’t fake my smile or feelings. Then what made you believe in the first meeting that it was an act?” I asked sternly, there was no point in dragging or twisting words.

“I.. uh.. I told you you were like my Mother.”

“You felt like this at Jared's wedding, you didn’t compare me to your Mother before that. Before the wedding, from what you told me, you sound like you were waiting for me perhaps…”

Continuing, I arched my brow, leaving his gentle grip on my head with a seriousness coming to my face,

He knitted his brows in confusion, “Waiting for what?”

“Waiting for me to burst and repeating these words- Those who ruined my home, may your home be ruined in the same way.”

His face turned pale. The reaction I was frightened to witness crept swiftly on his face, dropping my beats in apprehension. Pulling away instinctively from me, a horror spread across his aesthetic features.

“Why- Why are you silent, Dariel? D-Don’t look at me with this horror. You.. you have never heard me say it before, r-right?”

Cupping his cheeks, I brought his dreadful face near my face. Forcing out a shaky smile, I looked at him in expectation as tears collected in my eyes.

There was no way Sam would speak the truth. My Dariel would never be the reason behind my devastation.

“S-Saafia…”

His lips quivered, staring back at me in anguish, stealing my hopes in one eye.

“Say, Dariel, I would believe in anything you say, even lie, tell me.” I pleaded with him, willing to believe in him only and nothing else.

I needed his words more than anything yet received nothing in return.

“You saw me for the first time with Jared only, right? You don’t know me, right?”

Panting, I moved my hand around his neck to keep him locked with my gaze, agony building inside me at his absence of words.

“Why the fuck are you silent?! Answer, dammit!?”

Raising my voice, I hit his chest, pulling away roughly from him as he lowered his eyes shamefully. My chest clenched when his body was shaken.

“I am sorry… I am so sorry…”

Shaking his head, he scooted closer. Bringing his hand to touch me but they longer held the strength to do it.

“I was afraid to tell you but I never intend to break your heart. I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Saafia, please believe me, I-I was.. It just happened, I-I didn’t know what to do.” He cried, lowering his head. Tears of remorse rolling down his cheek.

Gathering my scattered form, I turned to him, narrowing my watery eyes in dejection.

“The pain is not that you did it, I am hurt because you knew you were my culprit yet never told me.” I whispered sorrowfully.

“Is that why you managed everything at the funeral and shifted him to a better hospital? To escape your inner guilt?”

The degree of being disheartened was unaccountable for me. The fact I was ignorant of it pierced me and the man I fell in love with never told me…

“I will be honest, I did it for you. My feelings, my actions towards you were all sincere.” He whispered, impotent to meet my eyes anymore.

“How can I believe you when you kept silent all this time, Dariel? Why didn’t you tell me?”

Failing to maintain my posture, my voice croaked in the middle, pulling my hair in anguish as the path before me began to blur.

I didn’t know what to do anymore.

“I didn’t want you to hate me. I was afraid of your resentment so I remained quiet. I never intended to tell you, I couldn’t bring myself to do it.” He continued from dejection but I was too heartbroken to react.

I wanted to yell at him but I found my strength drained.

“And now I can no longer bring myself to look at you in pride.”

Declaring with inexplicable disappointment, I rose from the seat, not wanting to spend a second with him as it would shatter my heart more.

“No, Saafia, listen-”

He tried calling me, holding my wrist but yanking my hand away from him furiously. I didn't want him to hold me after keeping such a big thing as a secret from me. Frowning in dejection, I enunciated coldly.

“You have disappointed me with your silence, Dariel Cannedy.”

Not giving him a moment to hold me, I walked out of the room, leaving him alone in his misery to think about his actions after keeping me in the dark all this time.