The Mate That Wasn't Mine novel Chapter 68

Chapter 68

TESSA POV

Luca and I have been trekking a full day and night. Dawn is rising and we haven’t done anything other than bathroom breaks and hand out more shitty cheese sandwiches. I don’t know why but it feels like some kind of punishment. I’ve got to endure. Compliantly. Gratefully..

Earn whatever imaginary badge he feels is necese

His men stalk behind us, over a hundred metres away. I don’t need my wolf to smell them when the wind turns. I’m guessing they are under orders to leave us alone. It doesn’t put me at ease.

It just makes me feel like an actor on a stage. Everyone studying my actions, hand gestures, the tilts of my head. Hours and hours of trying to not give away where my mind wanders during the silence. My gaze sticks on certain golden leaf colours, every berry bush ignites a thousand memories.

Thankfully Luca hasn’t been pushing to talk that much. We just stride together endlessly. Falling into the same comfortable silence I spent years of my life in. When we would fire and retrieve arrows endlessly and just exist.

He’s carrying two sets of bow and arrows, I’ve not been trusted with

How far would I go to find that cliff’s location?

weapon yet. I get to lug the ever–lightening bag of sandwiches.

Deep down I know Luca won’t be the only person who recognises such a distinctive place. I let myself down in the industrial zone. Too swallowed up in missing Maxim, overwhelmed by the noisy, smelly, metal misery to make proper enquiries.

I’ve got to toughen up. How many chances am I really going to get

If I get away from Luca I cannot waste another second.

Plus, something isn’t adding up.

be happy in this life?

Looking down at my orange dress for the thousandth time, it is back to normal, if a little rundown. But when we first started walking, it was covered in dust and and little clutches of sticky seeds were nestled into one of the pleats. Like I’d rolled through moss and clumps of thick brambles.

Which I haven’t. I was sat by the fire with Luca, only to fall asleep and be dumped back in the metal cage. The fact I cannot remember falling asleep is too large a gap to ignore. Not with everything I saw at Ravenbow.

But it is blank. There is nothing after Luca lit the fire. I’m in trouble here. I can feel it to the depths of my soul.

“Tessa?”

His deep voice is such a break in the monotony it makes me jump. “Yes?”

“You sure you don’t want to talk to me?”

“Where are those cliffs? Where do I need to walk to?”

From my peripheral visionl can see his jaw tighten with annoyance. Not the topic he wants to discuss. Almost two days on the road his boots are back to rough and scuffed, his brown leathers covered in a fine layer of dust.

“You know Feisty-”

“You can’t keep calling me that, that’s not…that’s not who we are.”

Luca merely raises an eyebrow. There wasn’t much talking back at him when we hung out at the archery range before. I think the first time I ever truly said no to him, was the night our mate bond sparked.

Clearing his throat. “You still haven’t told me about Ravenbow. We talked about going enough times. What was it actually like?”

12:39 Sat, 14 Jun

Chapter 68

“Ah…it was tough, I made friends though writing dently at the ground bath my text few ing the and tests i faced. Anything mundane and sale, down to the meals in the dining hall, I fum above,

Luca sniffs with amusement. “You aren’t actually bom to be quiet you know. You impose that on yout

“Sometimes it’s safer that way,” I answer, my defences rising. We’ve had this conversation enough times retor

“Not with these you trust.”

“Well, with my friends I spoke. There was a group of us. It was really nice. I was in the archery skills and wanttoring emeryutings rattle on mindlessly. Over the next half an hour with his gentle probing i mentioned everyone. Fight down to goodiging

He heard about sweet irene, chuckled at our adoption of Pawesome. Nodded silently at descriptions of and Sta themelord Waste genes and called her a livewire,

He’s trying to set me at ease. it’s doing the opposite. It’s all too jolly. Too light, it’s pretence. He doesn’t care about how bord Parbon. His fatura charm, no boyish cheek, only a dead, cold stare and a tarnished almond scent.

I promised not to dither anymore. Chances will not land into my lap. Instead of playing ball maybe I should stir things up force Laca to change is dan maybe make an error.

I don’t have my wolf functioning to advise caution.So, against every instinct in my body, yet knowing it is the right thing to do,ipfor the bight

“Luca, do you know all this already?”

He visibly stiffens, our walk falling out of sync. A few hours ago he gave up with the leather strap holding his hair up, it’s back to banging down in thick black tendrils towards his shoulders.

“What do you mean Feisty?”

It is my turn to stiffen at the way he refuses to drop my nickname. Maxim did. Another shameless mental comparison.

“You were writing notes onto soldiers‘ dead bodies about me. You must have had connections in Ravenbow. The Wardens were suspicious of my name from the moment I arrived.”

“I wanted you safe.”

“But I was safe there.”

There is a dark, feral tone to his voice when he sulkily replies. “Not without me.”

It’s so frustrating I shake my head. “Why couldn’t you let me have my shot! You knew how much I wanted it, I didn’t practice archery all those years to crash out like this!”

“Then why did you leave! You’ve told me all kinds of pointless shit, danced around the truth. What happened!”

The version of Luca who waited under my window or got petty vengeance against my father for his cruelties is gone. That isn’t the man I’m walking beside. The one who pins his love notes to dead bodies.

“I watched my best friend get shoved off a cliff! By Alpha Hale. It was so wrong, I couldnt serve under him anymore.”

“What did she do?”

Luca stops. Turning, forcing me to look at him. His dark eyes are cold and reptilian. No glimmers of midnight visible at all. But his huge body is a constant reminder that he could really hurt me should langer him.

I need to get rid of this wolfsbane rag around my neck and shift. Maybe I can hold onto a sharp rock and use it later when they’re not watching, A bathroom break perhaps?

12:39 Sat 14 Jun

Chapter 68

“Ah. It was tough. I made filends though, smiling gently at the ground beneath my feet. Describing the train journey, the packhour, the cüfferret dolls and tests I faced. Anything mundane and safe, down to the meals in the dining hall, I told him about.

Luca sniffs with amusement. “You aren’t actually born to be quiet you know. You impose that on yourself”

“Sometimes it’s safer that way,” I answer, my defences rising. We’ve had this conversation enough times before.

“Not with those you trust.”

“Well, with my friends I spoke. There was a group of us. It was really nice. I was in the archery skills and scent–tracing sections…” before proceeding to rattle on mindlessly. Over the next half an hour with his gentle probing I mentioned everyone. Right down to gossiping Malva.

He heard about sweet Irene, chuckled at our adoption of Pawesome. Nodded silently at descriptions of Kai and Silas. At the mention of Allette he grinned and called her a livewire.

He’s trying to set me at ease. It’s doing the opposite. It’s all too jolly. Too light. It’s pretence. He doesn’t care about how I found Ravenbow. His grin has no charm, no boyish cheek, only a dead, cold stare and a tarnished almond scent.

I promised not to dither anymore. Chances will not land into my lap. Instead of playing ball maybe I should stir things up. Force Luca to change his plan, maybe make an error.

I don’t have my wolf functioning to advise caution.So, against every instinct in my body, yet knowing it is the right thing to do, I go for the big hit.

“Luca, do you know all this already?”

He visibly stiffens, our walk falling out of sync. A few hours ago he gave up with the leather strap holding his hair up, it’s back to hanging down in thick black tendrils towards his shoulders.

“What do you mean Feisty?”

It is my turn to stiffen at the way he refuses to drop my nickname. Maxim did. Another shameless mental comparison.

“You were writing notes onto soldiers‘ dead bodies about me. You must have had connections in Ravenbow. The Wardens were suspicious of my name from the moment I arrived.”

“I wanted you safe.”

“But I was safe there.”

There is a dark, feral tone to his voice when he sulkily replies. “Not without me.”

It’s so frustrating I shake my head. “Why couldn’t you let me have my shot! You knew how much I wanted it, I didn’t practice archery all those years to crash out like this!”

“Then why did you leave! You’ve told me all kinds of pointless shit, danced around the truth. What happened!”

The version of Luca who waited under my window or got petty vengeance against my father for his cruelties is gone. That isn’t the man I’m walking beside. The one who pins his love notes to dead bodies.

“I watched my best friend get shoved off a cliff! By Alpha Hale. It was so wrong, I couldnt serve under him anymore.”

“What did she do?”

Luca stops. Turning, forcing me to look at him. His dark eyes are cold and reptilian. No glimmers of midnight visible at all. But his huge body is a constant reminder that he could really hurt me should fanger him.

I need to get rid of this wolfsbane rag around my neck and shift. Maybe I can hold onto a sharp rock and use it later when they’re not watching. A bathroom break perhaps?

2/4

Chapter 68

“Go on Feisty. What did your friend do that got her booted from the cliff in front of everyone?”

“She lied about having a mate. But the guy she lied with, he was hurting her. Hitting her. Making her so unhappy. But Alpha Hale decided to kill her fr make an example. He could have exiled her, been merciful.”

My throat goes dry.

“Exile isn’t mercy. I assure you.”

“Then forgiveness! It was a lie, yes, but she was a victim herself,” I argue back, setting off on my own walk, fully aware that I might gain enough distance to start working this wolfsbane rag away from my neck.

“That’s a big lie Tessa,” Luca snarls, ten paces behind me. “A mate that isn’t your own…what would have possessed your friend to do something so crazy?”

He knows. He knows and he’s toying with me.

I keep walking forward.